my ex filed a motion pro se to change physical & legal custody to her. The judge told her that the divorce was just granted and there is nothing he plans on changing. My ex was yelling and I lost my train of thought and forgot to ask the judge to dismiss the motion. Instead she kept yelling and the judge got loud with her and said he isn't changing anything with the order and asked her what she wanted. She then said that she wanted visitation with our kids so the judge ordered us to a free mediation. The judge already ordered her visitation but the first 6 visitations need to be in WI and not the state where she lives. We went to mediation and we didn't agree on anything so the mediator mentioned something about the judge maybe ordering a home study?!? I'm confused bc the judge already...
granted me sole legal and physical custody. When I told the mediator that she said "oh" so my question is during the next court date (in front of the judge) do I ask him to dismiss her motion? I don't understand what's going on and now I'm wondering why the mediator would say a home study may be done. I did freeze up the last court date and I should have asked the judge to dismiss this motion but I didn't. I don't know what my ex is doing now saying she just wants visitation. Then she should retract her motion since her motion clearly asks for sole legal and physical custody. What can I expect at the next court date. The mediator will tell the judge that mediation was unsuccessful and the judge already granted her visitation she just doesn't want to abide by the first 6 visits being done in this state.
During the first two years after the Judgment of Divorce there is a higher standard that a party must meet if s/he wants to change custody and/or visitation. That party must prove by substantial evidence "that the modification is necessary because the current custodial conditions are physically or emotionally harmful to the best interest of the child", instead of the standard "best interest" test.
This motion ought to be dismissed. If you don't feel that you will be able to speak your piece, then by all means, find an attorney in your county who has a substantial family law practice.
Teri M. NelsonDivorce / Separation LawyerWauwatosa, WI ·
Sir, you have posted many, many questions about your case on this forum. You try to address your case in pieces here and there and you are doing yourself and your children a very great disservice. Any answer you receive in this manner is not going to be accurate or is not going to be the best answer because it is taken out of context and without the entire picture. I am sure the judge is frustrated with the situation as well which is where things start to go terribly wrong for you (ordering mediation instead of dismissing the motion). If I recall from your prior posts, you had a very favorable decision at trial but now things are starting to get away from you again. The judge can only do so much and without attorneys to "steer the boat" if you will, things quickly get out of control. I strongly, strongly urge you seek experienced representation or these are the types of things that are going to continue to happen to you in court. You need a strong advocate who has no emotions attached to this case.
Go hire counsel. If you can not stay calm and level headed and unfrozen in court, you honestly owe it to yourself, and more importantly, to your children, to be properly represented.
You can ask for a motion to dismiss, but the key consideration is not the time since the last order was entered (although that does matter) but rather what are the change in circumstances. I would schedule a consultation with an attorney and go over this in more detail. My guess is those orders on custody and visitation have to do with much more than just your ex residing outside the state. And if she does not want to cooperate with in-state visitation, this may be a basis for you to in fact request changes and restrictions on placement.
Your previous judge will no longer be your family law judge as of the end of July. A new judge will be assigned and she will need to become more familiar with your case. You need to file a motion to dismiss forfailure to establish a substantial change of circumstances. Consult with an experienced family law attorney right away before the custody study wheels are placed in motion.
