How do I go about getting custody of my kids with out a lawyer. . .

Custody changes are rather difficult, so be aware of that. However, there is no requirement that you have a lawyer. You will have to familiarize yourself with the law and the proper procedures. The Indiana Code is located online as are the Indiana Rules of Evidence the Indiana Trial Rules, the Child Support Guidelines, Parenting Time Guidelines and local court rules.

You better have more evidence than what you have stated here. First, you cannot personally say what the children want - as that would be objected to as hearsay. Either the child would testify, there would be a custody evaluation, or an in-chambers interview. There are about seven factors that statute lists for evidence to show the judge what is 'in the best interests of the children.' Unless the other parent is in jail or shows up drunk or has severely neglected/abused the children, then you need substantial preparation prior to the court hearing. Preparation that is best handled by an attorney.

THE CHILDREN ARE WITH THE OTHER PARENT NOW. I THINK IT IS BEST THAT THEY STAY WITH ME MOST OF THE TIME. DO YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS? • Advice to clients: When you see mediator you should: a) Say "our" children or "our" child. Not "my" child, etc. b) Stress what is best for the children and not what you want c) Have a parenting plan for the other to visit, etc. d) Stress positives of yourself more than the negatives of the other party. e) It is OK to say something good about the other parent. f) Be child focused and not display anger to the other parent. g) Don't discuss time share in reference to percentages. Talk about days of the week, holidays, etc. but do not talk about percentages. h) You should bring all E-Mail and documents. Make sure the other side has seen the documents. You should bring all documents including those filed. Don’t say: "My lawyer has them." Make sure you have them. You should have phones of teachers, other professionals, etc. The following are suggestions to the client involved in a contested custody case. Always remember that there may be a change in custody in the future and therefore, the following suggestions should be taken into consideration. These suggestions are made for the present and future benefit of your children and the goal should always be to improve the children's life and to better provide for their needs. You should not expect to accomplish all these suggestions in a week or a month. We encourage you to supplement this list with items which you find appropriate, and in the best interest of the children. Write these down on the back of these pages as they come to your attention. Do it when the thoughts enter your mind and then, periodically, read again this entire list of suggestions. Remember: everything you do or do not do as a parent may have an effect on your children and their future. All you can do is try to act in the children's best interest, as you should always do. FOR THE NON-RESIDENTIAL PARENT SEEKING CUSTODY • Exercise your visitation right to the maximum. See, visit, and really get to know your children. Study the real needs of your children and really listen to what they have to say and, equally important, what they are not saying. Do not pry or attempt to become a private investigator and do not talk disparagingly of or belittle the other parent. Enjoy the time you spend with the children and allow them to enjoy you. • Start and keep a diary of events in order to remember and be able to point out dates, witnesses, facts, etc., when necessary. • Study and learn from your study how to be a better parent. Begin by selecting, from the bookstore or library, one or two books on child care, child raising, and parenthood. You can subscribe to Parent's Magazine or other specialized publications. Read all you can on the subject of children, children's development, parenting and how to be a good parent. If a class or study course in the general area becomes available, attend it. The local library has excellent books on developing parenting skills. • Attend the church, mosque or temple activities of your choice. Become active in the affairs and social activities of your religious group. Get to know and be known by those who do actively participate. Take the children with you to these activities whenever possible. If you are not religious then look to civic activities with youth. • Devote part of your spare time to civic activities and work with youth groups such as the Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, Little League, Campfire Girls, YMCA or group sports for children. Make your contributions to these or other worthwhile organizations and groups. Actively participate and get to know your children and how they play, develop and grow. Became a student of children and learn from them. • If the child is sickly or his or her grades are down in school get copies of the medical records or the school records if you cannot get them from the custodial parent. Get the records only if y