What is spousal abandonment? How long in North Carolina do you have to wait to file for divorce if adultery was committed?

You can't file for divorce until you have lived separate and apart for at least a year. You can and should file for child support, custody, postseparation support, alimony and equitable distribution ASAP. You should be able to get an order in place for at least postseparation support and child support fairly quickly. Consult with a local family law attorney and get started.

Sorry to hear about this! That's awful. Abandonment is never kind to the remaining spouse, but all the worse when there is a child involved, and on top of that, the health issues you mention. Consult with an attorney ASAP to discuss your separation rights of custody, child support, potential alimony/spousal support, splitting of assets and debts, retirement benefits, etc. And as for the actual divorce, yes you have to wait for 1 full year of separation, even if you can prove abandonment.