I have a Durable Power of Attorney over my mother who is starting the early stages of dimentia.

Adults are presumed competent unless or until a court says they are not. Courts base their decisions on a doctor's report regarding a person's capacity. That is why the bank and the casino can't help you. It is time to dicuss a guardianship with a local well regarded guardianship attorney. It is possible to get a guardianship of the estate of the person, or a guardianship of the person, or both. This is a complicated, expensive and time-consuming process but it may be necessary if you can't find any other options. A one-hour consult with a local well regarded guardianship attorney could put your mind at ease. Theresa Schrempp is in Bellevue and is very good. Oftentimes issues around finances are a important milestone in caring for an elder with capacity issues. I hope this helps. Elizabeth Powell

You may need to pursue a guardianship, but wouldn't it be nice if there were another way? Sometimes, unfortunately, the person who needs the protection is the last person to realize it. She may be in denial, or she actually may have a gambling addiction. Regardless of the cause, you would be way ahead of the game if she would agree, voluntarily to put away the checkbook. Therefore, I would like to suggest that you attempt mediation, before trying anything else. Mediation will enable you to communicate your fears to her, and the mediator hopefully will be trained in how to facilitate communication so that real listening occurs. You can also learn about her feelings and learn what needs are driving her behavior. If she really hears you and is willing to agree on a compromise that meets your need to ensure her well being, then everyone wins. If the two of you don't reach an agreement, a court declaration of incompetence to manage bank affairs would appear to be the next option. Mediation would cost a fraction of the legal remedies, and probably would leave you no worse off should legal action be necessary later. (However, this is not legal advice and you should pursue confirmation from an attorney in your jurisdiction whether or not this is true.) I've written a legal guide on discussing Elder Mediation ( linked below). My web site also has a couple of articles about Elder Mediation (also linked, below). Mediation does not take the place of court action. In some cases, court action will be necessary even if you try mediation. However, mediation does deserve a chance. It is based on a different paradigm, empowering people to act on their own behalf to forge voluntary solutions that are more creative and more closely tailored to the parties' needs than what a court could order. When she understands the depth of your concern, as well as when you understand your mother and find ways to help her meet her needs that do not involve writing checks, perhaps you'll find a truly authentic, voluntary solution. Good luck!

Having a power of attorney from your mother does not give you any authority "over" her, contrary to what most people believe. It simply permits you to transact business on her behalf, in accordance with her wishes, and in no instance can you act in a manner contrary to what she has instructed you, so long as she has not been declared incapacitated, or incompetent as defined by your jurisdiction's laws. Your mother may very well have become a compulsive gambler, rather than someone suffering from dementia, particularly if she is playing the slot machines at the casino, which are known to become very addictive to particular people, who will do anything to get to the machine and play again, even if they have to steal money to do so. Your mother is apparently still sharp enough to figure out how to get money from the bank, or get checks written at the right time in the monthly cycle, to use, knowing when such checks can clear the bank because she knows when deposits occur. I recommend you attend some Gamblers Anonymous meetings and you will likely learn a great deal about your mother that you never knew. Go online and read up on how senior citizens get addicted to gambling and some of the things they will do because of the compulsion. Also, check on all medications your mother is consuming. Certain ones are known to cause a particular susceptibility to gambling, and the patient becomes literally unable to stop the gambling compulsion while taking that particular medication. As for the legal remedy, you are in a difficult position, depending upon what mental deficiencies your mother actually has. See a guardianship attorney in your own state immediately to determine whether your state has a methodology for a case such as your mother's. If you can get her to a doctor for a good physical, do that, and then have a psychiatric evaluation. If she will not cooperate at all, you have no choice but to pursue a guardianship, in all likelihood. If you attend a few meetings for families of compulsive gamblers, you will find that everyone there can describe your mother as though they knew her, even though they never met her, and you will be taught how to respond to her compulsion, what to do and what not to do, etc. If she continues to write worthless checks, it will eventually catch up with her and she will be arrested, and that is, sadly, not all that uncommon in these situations. If I were you, I would double check to be sure that you will have no liability for any of the worthless checks your mother writes by being sure you are not a joint owner of the account, but merely have the right to sign on it by virtue of having a valid power of attorney. You could try sweeping money out of the account as quickly as it is expected to be direct deposited, so that there is no money there for her to have access to, but she would only revoke your power of attorney if you did that, which she does have a right to do so long as she is competent. Good luck with this very challenging situation. I believe if you explore things thoroughly, you will find that she has an addiction to gambling, and that she very likely is playing the more modern slot machines when she goes to the casino, or that she is taking one of the medications known to reduce the ability to control impulses telling her to gamble. Studies of the brain show that it is the pleasure experienced from the playing of the game of chance that causes the addiction, not the pleasure of winning, so it will not make any difference to the compulsive gambler whether they win or lose, though they may feel depressed about losing, and it will push them to do increasingly more alarming things to fund their habit. Protect your own assets and those of family and friends from your mother, because if she has such a compulsion, it knows no bounds. Become a detective and try to get a good diagnosis, find out what machines she plays, what games she plays when at the casino, and try to make her access to cash d