Do I have grounds for a restraining order?

You cannot seek a restraining order on behalf of your friend, although you can definitely be a resource to her in other ways, such as researching the law and helping her prepare her testimony. The standard for obtaining a restraining order is below. In order to obtain a 209A protective order, you must demonstrate two things, the first being abuse. Abuse is characterized as attempted physical harm, actual physical harm, being placed in fear of imminent serious physical harm, and/or forcing you to engage in sexual relations by force. You must also be able to demonstrate that you remain in reasonable imminent fear of this abuse. It seems that your friend is lacking the physical harm element. If you do not meet the above criteria, you could attempt to obtain a 258E harassment order. You must demonstrate that you have suffered 3 or more acts of harassment. These acts of harassment must be willful and malicious conduct aimed at you with the intent to cause fear, intimidation, abuse, or damage to property and that does in fact cause fear, intimidation, abuse, or damage to property. You must be able to demonstrate substantial likelihood of immediate danger of harassment when you initially go in front of a judge. It seems that your friend may have an easier time obtaining a restraining order under 258E if she can demonstrate that her ex-boyfriend has committed 3 or more acts of harassment against her. In either case, you must file a Complaint for Abuse Prevention Form with your local court. You will also be required to submit an affidavit of abuse. It is important that you use facts to explain your fear, citing the most recent abuse/harassing events. You do not need to include details of past events. Make sure that you explain the instances of harassment as required by the law listed above. It is important to take into consideration your friend's ex-boyfriend's propensity for violence and think about how he will react when he finds out that your friend is trying to obtain a restraining order against him. It is important that your friend remains safe through this difficult process. It would be helpful to retain a lawyer who specializes in domestic violence proceedings to help you prepare testimony and/or represent your friend at the hearing.

You do not have standing to request a restraining order against your friend's ex-boyfriend. The probable reason for the denial of your friend's initial request for a restraining order is the alleged facts seem to lack an element of imminent fear of substantial physical harm to your friend. Name calling is not enough to obtain restraining order, nor are threats to other people. Your friend may, however, seek a 258E harassment order, which only requires her to show "3 or more acts of willful and malicious conduct aimed at a specific person committed with the intent to cause fear, intimidation, abuse or damage to property and that does in fact cause fear, intimidation, abuse or damage to property; or (ii) an act that: (A) by force, threat or duress causes another to involuntarily engage in sexual relations” (G.L.ch. 258E, sec.1.). Your friend may also report her ex's behavior to the police, as the alleged facts may create probable cause to charge the ex with criminal harassment and threats to commit a crime. Finally, she should consider changing her phone number and email address and blocking the ex on any social networking sites, making sure to keep all text messages and voicemails from the ex for use in any application for a harassment order and/or criminal complaint.

If you have personal knowledge of anything that he has done (and by that I mean that you either heard or saw it yourself and are not relying upon information that was reported to you), you could have an Affidavit prepared setting forth this information, and your friend could submit it to the Court in support of a request for a restraining order.