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Do I need to accept certified mail from my ex husband?
Anonymous3 views2 answers
My ex and I just mediated (for the 2nd time) in October. Recently, I've been getting condescending emails asking that I not attend her soccer games on my weekends, go on school field trips, etc. I have continued to take her to her games, and they are clearly annoyed. I have not answered one email from him and his wife, as I did not see if necessary, since they had no ground to stand on.
Today I received a notice of certified mail (large envelope) at my door. I have not signed for it, and am wondering what if they are just reaching for something, or if they're trying to serve me with something.
Thoughts on whether to pick package up or not?
Here's an easier way. Go to the website for the Court, or on Monday, call the Court. Give them your case number and judge, and see if there's anything new that has been filed upon your case-- if you can't pull the information off of the Internet.
I respectfully disagree with my colleagues it is always a good thing to accept certified mail-- particularly if someone is trying to get the drop on you. While they might use a personal process server, certified mail is a cheap way to obtain service of process-- and in a contentious process, I like to make the other side work-- and spend money, which tends to take a little bit of the wind out of their sails.
If it's new, contact your lawyer. He can best advise you whether to pick up the package or not. Sometimes, as a trial tactic, opposing counsel may try to serve you as close as possible to the few days required for service prior to the court date-- which limits your options and how to respond. Since this matter has been mediated and has been in court before, I am sure that you are both armed with capable trial lawyers-- and since the tone of the conduct has been nasty, save the e-mails of the certified letters, but before you accept this one – talk to your friendly neighborhood lawyer-- and listen to him. Good luck.
I do not have a crystal ball so I have no idea what the certified mail is about.
The certified mail could be from anyone.
I highly recommend that you accept it.
It could be for a court date. If you don't accept it and miss it a court date then your ex wins!
In other words, sticking your head in the sand like an ostrich and ignoring something is never a good idea.
You did not ask but I will add this...print out his emails and save any voice mail messages for future use.
The two of you will be co-parenting (and later co-grandparenting) the rest of your lives. They might not like it but you need to find a way to get along.
I can't remember the name of the website but there is a site that both parties pay for on an annual basis that allows the judge to review all your emails back and forth that usually solves the nasty email issue. Many judges are now ordering it when communication issues are a problem for divorced parents. I think it costs less than $100 per side per year and it seems to end a lot of bickering since the judge can read everything.
Good luck!
